Queer Melancholy

:(

Hate integration hate graphs hate functions hate inequalities hate partial fractions hate binomial expansions, hate logarithms hate APGP hate trigonometrical functions hate differentiation hate integration hate maclaurin's series hate vectors hate mathematical induction hate differential equations hate probability

Hate math Hate Math HATE MATH!

Pardon me, I'm losing it. Tomorrow's my Math paper and I'm staring (yes, STARING) at my lectures notes with such an intensity that perhaps it might go up in flames. Burn baby, BUUURN...

All right, that's it, I've gone nuts. But I should be all right soon. I think.

Oh, the horror...

Today, I have survived a very draining and exhausting and trying event. I clawed and fought my way through and trudged on with all my might. And now, I have emerged, not totally unscathed (I'm pooped), but alive. I have survived... FIVE HOURS of EXAMS.

Hahaha, all right, that was quite an exaggeration. But you try having 5 hours of exams in one day. I had a 2 hours Economics paper in the morning, followed by a 3 hours Biology paper in the afternoon. Suffice to say, I was fighting the big Z monster during my Biology paper.

Sigh, my mind has been blown to bits. But alas, I have a Chemistry paper tomorrow morning. Speaking of which, I had better get going with my revision soon. *grumbles unintelligibly*

Home Alone

This is it, I'm all home alone with my sister, maid and aunt. Dad went overseas to play golf, Mum went on a vacation with my youngest sis and grandpa. And I am stuck at home. Why? Cos of this evil little (okay maybe not little) nasty impending event called the JC2 March Block Tests. And I am so screwed because I can't seem to find the motivation or drive or will to mug my brains out. Somebody shoot me.

Last Saturday, I went to NUS Open House with Doris and Sabrina. It was interesting. University life is so much more different from that of JC life. It seemed kind of hard to believe that I'd be entering a university in just like sometime during next year (assuming that of course, I'd done sufficiently well for my A' level examinations). Was it already nearly 2 years ago that I was sitting for my O' level exams? How time flies. There's just this odd mix of anticipation and yet apprehension about moving on into the next phrase, next chapter of my life - University.

Growing up can be a scary thing.

Last Sunday, I attended Shi Yun's grandfather's wake at her grandma's house void deck, with Li Zhen. It has been eons since the 3 of us met up like this. Just the 3 of us, sitting down and talking together. We've stuck through thick and thin throughout our first two years in secondary school. That day, we did a lot of catching up. Shi Yun talked a lot about her Poly life. Haha. Gee, I miss those two.

Alas, I should be going off to study soon. See you. Have a good day ahead (:

Paris... is for throwing open the windows and letting in... letting in La Vie En Rose...

I was feeling emotional today, kinda depressed and weirdly sad, for reasons I am unable to fathom, but all I felt like doing was to haul my golf set to the nearest driving range, press a 120 golf balls from the machine and hit them all till my heart's content. Perhaps my sadness may fly off with the golf ball and be blown away by the wind. But alas, I seem to have misplaced my golf set. Gotta unearth them soon and you must be amazed by how disorganized my life is to be able to misplace something as gigantic as an entire golf set. But in the meantime...

What a day! A day spent alone to bask in the comforting solace that solitude offers, with my ever faithful companions - music and books. I went to Bras Basah, walked around and bought a book by Sandra Brown. Then I went to the National Library and studied my Chemistry notes for a while, until I decided that nothing was going into my head. I was oddly restless today. Then I walked around in Bugis Junction for a very short while before taking the train to head home.

Having missed lunch, I whipped up some noodles and settled in front of the television with Tallie's "Sabrina" DVD. And my gosh, it turned out to be such a wonderful movie! It was the original one by the way, starring Audrey Hepburn, Humphrey Bogart and William Holden and it was all in black and white. And it was absolutely wonderful. I was completely captivated, enthralled, enchanted and tickled pink with laughter and love. It's a romance/comedy and an absolutely stunning one at that.

Indeed, Paris is for throwing open the windows and letting in... letting in La Vie En Rose.
-Sabrina Fairchild,
Sabrina

And the rain fell harder...

Every human being has a limit to nearly everything. A limit to the level of tolerance, a limit to the amount of patience, a limit... When too many disturbing events occur in too short a time span, that limit is rapidly reached.

She was walking along the road. But she wasn't heading for home. Too many things had happened, and had happened too suddenly. Her thoughts were in a mess. Her cellphone rang. Dazzedly, she clicked it off. Excusing herself from a group of people, she took off for the solace of solitude. The tears were coming in earnest now. She finally sat by the road, clutching her bag to her chest. Why is this happening? The sky was swifty darkening. Grey clouds swarmed above in the skies. Good, the mood fits. Within minutes, rain began to fall from the heavens above. She continued to sit, unmoving, by the side of the road. With a punishing intensity, the rain fell harder...